My sister has stage four lung Cancer.
She has never smoked.
I have, on and off again, and quit entirely,
I don’t remember exactly when.

My sister is one of four girls, the ‘middle’ child
In essence, not strictly. She’s 48 years old,
Ten years younger than my mother when
She died of Cancer that began in her uterus.

It’s a living hell all over again.

Don’t tell me not to ask why not me
Instead of her, or why her instead of me,
Two sisters out of four out of four out of four
Could be me yesterday today tomorrow.
I’m the one who took a risk -cigarette after
Cigarette I feel sick in my heart
Even though I know the life expectancy
Of a woman in the U.S.
Is missed time and time again.

Her voice -the quiet.
My powerless words “I love you…
I’m your kid sister…I love you” again.
Her weakened, soft voice, “I hope
I see you soon.”